Have you been asking yourself…
What happened to the partner that I fell in love with?
Why do they want to spend time with me?
Why does every conversation end in an argument?
Why don’t they see me or hear me any longer?
Do they still love me? Do I still love them?
Is this leaving you…
Frustrated and emotionally exhausted?
Wondering how bad things can get?
Wondering if the love you had for each other is gone?
Thinking about separation or divorce?
Does your partner appear to be…
Judgmental? Controlling? Disinterested?
Distant? Always Angry, Critical? Irresponsible? Selfish?
Immature? Demanding or too needy?

If you can relate to these questions, take Relationship Reflection Survey below!
Does your partner blame you for everything? Yes or No
Do you wonder if you will ever meet their expectations? Yes or No
Does your partner hear, see and respect you? Yes or No
Do you feel unappreciated and taken advantage of? Yes or No
Are you mentally exhausted by the arguing and reaching your breaking point? Yes or No
Is your connection with them broken and you feel like room mates? Yes or No
Do you say to yourself “I want to be happy and something has to change?”" Yes or No
Do you have children and wonder about the consequences of the dysfunctional Yes or No
Relationship that they are witnessing on a daily basis?
If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then what are you waiting for?
If nothing changes where will you be in 1 year?
What about 5 years? 10 years?
Is that what you wanted for your life?

Here is how I do Couples Therapy

“I utilize a therapeutic approach called Relational Life Therapy,
where I help you become relational with yourself and then with your partner”

“What we won’t be doing is coming into weekly sessions and arguing about arguments!”
That is just a waste of all of our time because nothing is done to work on root issues that lead to lasting change!
What you will do is tap into the ways in which you are reacting in your relationship based on your inner child and learn skills that effective partners utilize to get their partners to hear and see them without all the drama.
Phase #1: Data Gathering

I meet with you and your partner together discuss the therapy process and challenges.

The following sessions I will work with each of you on an individual basis. These sessions will help me getter a better understanding of your concerns, relationship challenges, what your dreams are and what it feels like to
be in a relationship with your partner.
”We develop a plan to make your relationship better!”

Phase #2: Joining Through The Truth!

In this phase, I do most of the work through helping each of you identify what is not working and
what needs to be changed in a compassionate albeit no-nonsense way. I help you understand what your dysfunctional dances are that are creating chaos in your relationship and life.
”We don’t have time to beat around the bush so I walk right over it to address the relationship dysfunction!”

Step #3: Healing

This is the hard part! We work as a team to make meaningful changes in your lives?

This is the phase when you have to start doing some work that is needed to make meaningful changes.
Like I said “Change doesn’t happen when couples come into therapy to argue about their arguments.”
Welcome to “Relationship Basic Training”
In this phase I will guide you we work to heal your inner child and free the adaptive child that you created
to survive your childhood that is currently in a relationship with your partner.
Your trauma will leave you either walled off due to abandonment suffered as a child or boundaryless due to being raised
by a caregiver that you become enmeshed with.
You will behave when triggered in a reactive mode to resist what is coming at you from your partner
or a modeling mode in which you will model the behavior of your caregiver when triggered.
This adaptive child is a black and white thinker, relentless, harsh
rigid, certain, grandiose and tight in the body.
”We find your wounded inner child and have a conversation with them and help them understand that you have their back”

Step #4: Discovering your Wise Adult and Embarking on your Journey To Finding Your True Self!

Breaking old habits is not easy and there is no easy button when we are trying to develop a relationship with another human being that is so different from ourselves. If it was easy, than I would not have a job and you would be engaging in a loving and fulfilling relationship. Partners who have wonderful relationships have fun together, then enjoy each other company, then miss each other when they are apart, they work as a team to take on the world and embrace the mindset “It is us against everything”, they have each other’s back through think and thin, then are kind and respect each other and can’t wait to share what they have going on in their life, they are vulnerable with each other and provide each other with the safety and comfort that is needed is such a challenging world! Their lives together are filled with love, tenderness, affection, intimacy, friendship, did I mention FUN! and also generally interested in their partner’s world.

In this last phase of therapy, you will further develop your skills that successful partner’s utilize to have happy and healthy relationships. You will both become experts in yourselves and each other and it will feel genuine. You will both discover how to wake up your wise adult that is compassionate, forgiving, soft, gentle, loving, flexible and open which in turn will open your hearts for more affection, tenderness and sexual desire as your love for each other grows.
”Life is too short not to live your best life now and why save the good stuff for later!”

Common Questions

My partner does not believe in therapy?
To be honest it is hard to get everyone to buy in. Either one partner is leaning and wants things to get better while the other one is leaning out and thinks therapy is a waste of time.
Answer: This is the time in your life when you have to stand up for yourself because the current relationship status is toxic and how much more time of your life do you want to spend going through the motions and just existing?

We don’t have the time to do couples therapy?
That could be one of the challenges in your relationship. Prioritizing everything accept what is really important. Your mental health and happiness.
Answer: First step is asking yourself what is important? Second, I offer telehealth to meet you half-way!

How long will therapy Take?
The length of therapy will vary according to your needs, and how much you are willing to do when you are not with me. I ask couples to commit to at least 3 months.

Some partners feel satisfied with their changes after just a few weeks, and some continue to feel that important changes are happening for an entire year.

Of course, you can change your mind any time along the way. At three months, we will want to re-evaluate to see if further therapy is needed.
To summarize: The more work you do the less therapy is needed!

Do you take insurance?
I offer private pay and I will be accepting most insurances in May.

I am a therapist that offers couples counseling and therapy in the cape cod, MA and surrounding area. I service clients in person from Plymouth, MA, Kingston, MA, Wareham, MA, Sandwich, MA, Carver, MA, Bourne, MA, Buzzards Bay, MA, Duxbury, MA. I am a therapist that offers family counseling and therapy to families in the Plymouth, MA and Cape Cod Areas. I also offer couples counseling to all residents of MA via Telehealth.